I’m dreaming up free-falling into something deep, 
but I’m clinging to the shred of five seconds 
nothing but gravity has her hands on me.  
Sometimes I feel like I’m getting over everything. 
Sometimes I feel strong enough to put precisely my needs,
and others, I want to crawl inside a memory
of a version of myself who knew herself quite well. 
Far before now.  Or then.  

It’s become clear to me that it doesn’t matter how where I go
because your eyes won’t look at me that way again
and that’s the home I look for in every place.  
Look at all the space in the room where we once lived
when I was always trying to move-
You were on Saturday, and I, lost in the week, but
we were happy, darling. 
I understand now all those things you saw in me
struggling to float to the surface.
You saw the disarray, but you heard my heart.
You felt the heat source when I was lost in the sunset
and it was enough.  But I wasn’t, for me.
And only, for you, have I felt so… real.  
So much more me than I could have dreamed up.
And I loved You.

You love someone else and it fills my heart to know,
but I can’t help but find that every fresh start leads back to you,
in this way or that.
We stopped colliding because I started hiding,
in the nooks and crannies of our universe,
which leaves us on the same street, in the same song,
a regret apart.  Time and time again.